Learning about others’ beliefs builds community

Heineken recently released a commercial that attempted to do more than just promote better beer, it attempted to promote better community. m

In our world today, we have many issues that we use to either define ourselves or define others. This attempt to categorize humans is not just overly simplistic, it is also dangerous and has led to many examples of divisiveness, violence and unrest.

The commercial opens by asking individuals to define their belief on certain issues that have splintered our communities.

They are later paired with someone of the opposing view, however, neither are aware of the opinion of their partner.

The two are put alone in a giant warehouse where, through note cards, they are asked to complete tasks together. Eventually, the cards prompt them to sit and answer questions about themselves.

Naturally, some of their conversations go a little deeper than what the instructions on the cards request. One of the tasks the pair is asked to complete is to take prefabricated pieces and use them like puzzle pieces to assemble a bar.

They are then tasked with retrieving two beers from the cooler and placing the drinks on the bar. Once this is completed, their attention is directed toward a short film in which the two find out that they have opposing views on some very divisive issues. Once the video is done playing, they are given an option to stay, share a drink together and engage in conversation, or they can leave.

All of the pairs in the video stay to talk. What is so touching and powerful about the commercial is that they all choose to stay, not to argue their respective points, but to continue to learn more about the story of the individual they are with.

Now, I am not so naive to think this was the case with all the participants. If, in fact, this was a real experiment, I’m sure there were plenty of pairs who chose not to stay and engage with each other.

Nonetheless, the power of this commercial lies in the understanding that we all have a choice to engage with empathy and kindness.

It is possible, as the commercial shows, to engage peaceably with those who think and believe and live differently than us. When we choose to hear the story of another human being, our understanding broadens, walls of mistrust are brought down, and an “issue” becomes the landscape of someone’s life instead of a simplistic sound bite we are fed via the media or, dare I say, pulpits.

There is a popular quote that states, “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” This is true of every person who has ever walked the earth. We all have our own battles and our own challenges in life.

It is this very truth about all of us that often causes our division. Through our battles, we all look towards constructs such as relationships, religion and politics to help us find some stability in our worlds.

The challenge comes when your way of making your world stable seems to have some destabilizing effect on my world. What the commercial encourages us to do is to listen to each other and to understand why the other thinks or believes the way he or she does.

Often, if we allow ourselves to listen to understand someone else’s battle, their beliefs and practices become understandable. We don’t have to be in complete agreement with someone in order to be empathetic to their battle, and perhaps, you may even be able to relate to their battle.

I leave you with a challenge. Find someone you know you have differing views with and invite them to a drink. It doesn’t have to be a beer, but perhaps coffee or tea. Challenge yourself to listen with the intent to understand them, not to combat them.

You never know, you may walk away with more than a better understanding of an issue, you may walk away with a friend. Cheers.