Act as though Jesus was standing next to you

How and where a person meets their spouse varies, but some very basic rules for a union of marriage stays the same. The couple meets and establishes a relationship and each wants to know as much about the other as they possibly can.

I remember when I was in the courtship stage with my wife and we exchanged many letters. Every time I received a letter I would glean as much information as possible to try to find out exactly what she wanted and how to meet those needs. Sometimes I would study the letter or think about a few words or sentences to see if there was a hidden meaning that was not readily obvious. On some occasions, I would ask other older, wiser people if there was a meaning I did not catch. Often, they would tell a story or give me information that brought new meaning to the message. Sometimes we would spend extended periods of time talking about our past, present and what we hoped for the future. When we were together, I watched her facial expressions and often I would discover what she was thinking just by the way she looked.

On one occasion I made a thoughtless comment that hurt her feelings deeply, I remember the hurt look in her eyes. I could say nothing to make the comment go away, but I vowed never to make the comment again. On another occasion after we were married we had several months of one disaster after another that finally peaked with our home burning down we went looking for a camp trailer to live in while we rebuilt. We looked at several trailers, but when we walked into the last one I saw her eyes light up, even though we couldn’t really afford the trailer I agreed to buy it because it made her happy.

While we were dating I was the world’s biggest slob. Dirty laundry decorated the house, dropped wherever it was taken off at, and usually I was wearing the cleanest dirty clothes. Dirty dishes filled the kitchen sink, often nearly to the ceiling. To find the floor nearly required a large front loader and a lot of patience (OK, I’m exaggerating a little). As our relationship grew stronger and we began to get to know each other better I slowly made minor changes in my life to accommodate my someday bride.

After I was married, there were some dramatic changes. I stopped spending as much time with my friends and spent more time with my wife. I found myself speaking with other women as though my wife were standing right next to me listening to my every word. Our individual friends have been joined by mutual friends who share mutual interests. I shared income with my wife. Eventually, I even stopped being terrified of the five most terrifying words a wife can say: “honey, we need to talk” (that means shut up and listen; I’m not happy and I’m going to tell you why).

I discovered that I could trust my wife to take care of matters she said she would take care of. As her husband, I am also her protector. Usually, I greet people at the door, not as a control issue but as a method to stop trouble there. As strange as it may sound I even sleep between her and the door no matter where we are. I know I can’t stop all the hurts of the world, but I can slow them down or in some cases mitigate them.

Oddly enough there is a relationship described in the Bible very similar that a husband and wife have, only it is between the Christian and the Lord. The relationship is described in Matthew 25:1-13. If you are not familiar with this passage I recommend you read it.

It speaks of a bride waiting for a groom that has delayed his coming. Some brides will grow weary of the wait and not be prepared for the arrival of the groom (Jesus). As the bride, we should be prepared for the day when we meet him.

Some may see this as the day of rapture, but suppose that day never comes for you? Suppose you die today in an accident, would you be prepared to meet your groom? More importantly, would you know who the groom is? Would you know what the groom expects from you? Have you consulted with those who know the groom better than you do? Have you read the letters from the groom and studied his words carefully, or just raced through the words not understanding much of it? Is your life consumed with the dirty laundry of sports, money and any other distraction that will not be agreeable with the new spouse you will meet?

Have you any understanding of what makes your future groom smile? Have you made the changes that the groom requires of spending time with him, talking to him in prayer, listening to his words in the Bible, learning that he is your provider and protector and learning to trust that he provides and protects? Have you lived by the two greatest commandments of Mathew 22:36-40 — if you love God you will know him? Do you love your neighbor as you love yourself and do what is right not necessarily what is legal (when it is legal but not right)? When you speak to others, do you do it as though Jesus were standing next to you?

When the day comes for you to knock on Jesus’ door seeking to go in, will Jesus say “go away, I know you not,” or will he say “come in faithful servant, he who has served me well?” How will you respond if he asks, “Why should I let you in?”

Mike Blodgett is chaplain for Lighthouse Chapel. Contact him at lighthouse_chapelak@yahoo.com.

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