Anchors aweigh at tape and cardboard regatta

WASILLA — Alaska State Troopers are used to responding to accidents on the water, but Saturday was the agency’s first experience with potentially becoming an accident in the water.

Trooper Lance Ewers built and raced the fastest boat in the third annual Duct Tape Regatta on Wasilla Lake.

His large Viking-inspired vessel cruised through the lake’s course in a blistering 1 minute 55 seconds. After two hours of frantic building, his cardboard and duct tape creation stayed water-tight and upright.

“What a great time,” he said. “It’s a lot of fun and the kids have a good time.”

Although Ewers was all smiles and high-fives after finishing the regatta, he wasn’t as optimistic prior to the race.

“I’m at a good 80 percent confidence level,” he said while scrambling to finish his boat. “A lot of time, sweat and energy has been put into the USS Trooper. I think she’s seaworthy.”

All seven of the Duct Tape Regatta teams were under the same pressure, said Nancy Hall, district manager for American Red Cross Mat-Su, which organized the event. Teams have two hours to build their boats, which can only be made out of cardboard and duct tape. Other items can be used as paddles, except a standard boat paddle.

One of the first teams to start construction was Linda Brendon State Farm, which constructed its version of the SS Minnow. It was an ironic choice, as the Minnow is famous on television for grounding on an island and marooning seven people on “Gilligan’s Island.”

“We hope and pray it floats,” said TaraBeth Armstrong. “We are attempting to make the SS Minnow, but it’s not going to turn out exactly that way because we only have two hours.”

In that short time, the team not only constructed a cardboard vessel, it was also decked out with an anchor, outboard motor (cardboard, of course) and a life preserver.

If the boat lived up to its namesake, “We’re going to look really cool while it sinks,” Armstrong said. “We’re going to go down in a blaze of glory.”

The Minnow didn’t sink, but the State Farm team made sure it was prepared for anything.

“Yes, it is insured,” she said.

Next to the State Farm team was an energetic group from Walgreens that entered boats in the adult and youth races. Like the other competitors, the construction period was also spent worrying about whether their creations could finish the race.

“We’re just hoping it’s a boat that doesn’t sink, that’s our goal,” said Cindy Maillette. She also had an advantage “because I was playing Jimmy Buffett a few minutes ago, so I’m feeling it. That does give us an edge.”

Another ace in the hole for Walgreens was Jeff Schulz, an engineer who helped build the bullet-like vessel captained by Kirk Guthrie.

“It’s not going to sink,” Guthrie said with confidence. If it does, “Jeff gets all the blame and I get wet.”

While the USS Trooper was the fastest on the water Saturday, nobody could touch the two-time defending creative champions. The Obeso family and friends won the first two Duct Tape Regatta creative awards with a gondola and a crab fishing boat, complete with a boom and crab trap. This year, the team launched The Peculiar Palmer Pirate.

Captained by Ryland Obeso, the purple and black ship was stable and imaginative, complete with a large skull and crossbones and Jack, the stuffed pirate monkey.

“It was actually pretty epic,” Obeso said after his run on the lake. “I just had fun and I didn’t have to use the bail bucket. When I was paddling, it started swerving a little bit, but you just got to know the paddle movements. It looks like it can go for a second time.”

The bucket was the work of his younger brother, Griffin.

“I’m making a bail bucket, and it’s actually pretty fun,” Griffin said. “It’s so, like, the pirate can bail out the water.”

For the most part, the seven boats proved surprisingly seaworthy. The only competitor to get wet was Briana Howard, who piloted one of the Walgreens boats in the 13- to 17-year-old division. Fighting a severe left lean for most of her race, the boat finally tipped her out right at the finish line.

The only other casualties were four members of the Mat-Su Borough Water Rescue team, who all piled into the USS Trooper for a victory run. After a couple of minutes paddling in the lake, the rescue team capsized the boat.

Contact Greg Johnson at greg.johnson@frontiersman.com or 352-2269.