Anti-harassment awareness addressed at Palmer Middle

PALMER-- Nearly 700 students at Palmer Junior Middle School spent an hour learning about the Violence/Kindness Continuum at the school's anti-harassment awareness assemblies last week. Brothers Sterling and Garth Grover conducted 11 assemblies about the continuum and how students can positively influence the school's atmosphere.

"Here at Palmer Junior Middle School we are concerned about climate," said Sterling, the PJMS home-to-school coordinator. "We want you to feel the difference, that we each belong at Palmer Junior Middle School."

The Grovers spoke with all PJMS students about the two ways one can react to another person: Either with violence or kindness. The continuum showed how violence starts with just ignoring someone and moves up the scale to bullying, threatening and even as far as hate crimes and murder. The kindness side of the continuum starts with eye contact and a smile, and moves forward to sticking up for someone and finally giving your life for someone else.

"If I'm tearing another person down, it's a pretty good indication that I'm on the violence side," said Garth, the PJMS school-within-a-school coordinator. "If I'm building someone up, I'm on the kindness side."

All sixth, seventh and eighth graders at PJMS attended the anti-harassment assembly. The room remained quiet and all eyes were forward as the brothers ran through a number of upbeat, comical situations where a person could either respond with violence or kindness.

"[The students] have all been very respectful and responsive," Garth said.

The Grovers explained that there are usually three types of people in a bullying or harassment situation: The victim, perpetrator and the bystander. Sometimes these roles are interchangeable; someone who is victimized may turn around and victimize someone else.

"At some point, some place, something is going to affect you where you feel like the victim," Sterling said.

The Grovers explained to the students that being a bystander to a violent act is actually encouraging the perpetrator to continue his or her violent behavior.

"If you stand and watch, know you have stepped close into the violence zone," said Garth, who stressed that if you witness or are a victim of harassment, you should report it.

"Tattling is when you want to tell on someone to hurt the other person," Garth said. "If you want to help a person harassing you to stop, that's reporting."

The continuum was also applied to how teachers deal with altercations with students. PJMS utilizes the Step system; if a student is out of line the teacher only has to mention what step level that student is at to warn the student to act appropriately. The highest step is Step Four, which automatically brings a parent to the school to deal with the situation. The brothers stressed that the Step program isn't meant to embarrass or upset a student -- it's a way for teachers to set guidelines without stepping into the violence spectrum with impatience or threats.

"All a Step Four conference does is bring someone on the scene who loves you more than we do," Garth said.

The anti-harassment awareness program was developed by the Grovers after they learned about the violence/kindness continuum at a course that they and other teachers at PJMS attended on climate in schools.

"We often hop in after something has gone wrong," Garth said. "We wanted to do something to help things go right."

Equally important as understanding the violence/kindness continuum, the Grovers also explained that it's also up to the victim to stick up for him or herself without becoming violent themselves.

"You can be assertive and stay on the positive side of the spectrum," Sterling said.

Contact Jen Ransom at jen.ransom@frontiersman.com.