Anyone can make bad choices

Choose Respect is in its third year. More than 100 Alaska communities — including Wasilla, Palmer, Willow and Sutton — took to the streets to raise awareness of that most shameful of Alaska’s problems — domestic violence and sexual abuse.

To describe the abuse problem as an epidemic seems right. For evidence we offer a single statistic: 58 percent of Alaska women have been victims of this kind of abuse.

But we’re in our third year here. Countless stories have been written and newscasts aired. And this isn’t our first editorial on the subject. Is there’s really anything left to say?

Here’s something:

“You guys, this is amazing,” event organizer Becky Stoppa told the crowd of more than 300 people who turned out in Palmer.

Here’s another one:

“This really says something for our community, that we Choose Respect here,” Palmer Mayor DeLena Johnson said.

OK, one more:

“It’s great to see so many young people,” said corrections commissioner Joe Schmidt.

That last quote gave us pause.

In previous years it was hard not to notice that the crowd was made up mainly of advocates and lawyers, law enforcement types and prison officials.

It was a refreshing change to see so many new faces from school-age youth to professionals who made it a priority to attend.

But the goal, everyone seems to agree, is to change attitudes, to make this kind of treatment of women, children and men unacceptable in the state. If the goal is to change the future, we see no better way to accomplish that than to deliver this message to an auditorium filled with teens and preteens.

We, of course, hold no illusions. We were there. We saw plenty of bored faces and were well aware that a lot of kids saw the rally as an opportunity to be out of school and to socialize amongst themselves.

But we also saw quite a few paying rapt attention. The crowd knew when to applaud and when to quiet down. Chaperones circulated among them, talking about the event and driving home its message.

We all know that ending domestic violence and sexual abuse demands more from us than one day of attention each year. But what we saw Thursday was a big, loud step in a healthy direction.

We were grateful so many of our friends and neighbors made it a priority in their busy lives to stand together and tell our neighbors who are victims of such horrible crimes that we stand with them; they are not alone.

Anyone can make bad choices. Anyone can be a wife beater or a child molester: There is good and bad in all of us. To end this blight on Alaska, we must each choose respect. Every day. Every time.

That reminds us of a traditional Cherokee story about a grandfather teaching his grandson.

“My son, there is a battle between two wolves inside us all. One is evil. It is anger, jealousy, greed, resentment, inferiority, lies and ego,” the grandfather said. “The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, humility, kindness, empathy and truth.”

Silent for a moment, the boy replied, “Grandfather, which wolf wins?”

Softly the old man answered, “The one you feed.”

Thursday’s rally was a chance for us as a community to feed the good wolf. We must take every opportunity to nurture what’s best in our community, in each other, if we are to make Alaska safe for all people.