Can we Talk? Rather, Can we Listen to One Another?

In my daily devotions on Tuesday, May 16, I was reading through Joshua 22 and rediscovered a strange account. (There are many surprising stories in Scripture which can cause one to wonder, or to react in sorrow, or in joy.) When the Israelites had finished taking possession of the land of Canaan, the tribes living on the east side of the Jordan River returned to their homes. But, these tribes on the east had fears that the Jordan, which separated the tribes geographically, might also separate them in other ways from the rest of Israel, and perhaps hinder their worship of the Lord. So, in Joshua 22:10 we read, “the Reubenites, the Gadites and the half-tribe of Manasseh built an imposing altar there by the Jordan.” However, these tribes in the east had not shared their concerns with the Israelites living in the west. When the tribes on the west side of the Jordan River found out about the altar, they gathered to wage war against their brothers in the east. The tribes on the west side of the Jordan River suspected idolatry, and did not want to suffer for the sins of their fellow Israelites. You see, they were not talking with one another. Ultimately, the tribes on the west sent messengers to the tribes on the east and discovered their fears, and their intent to remain true to the Lord. This last minute communication prevented a terrible war between God’s children. Do you see how dangerous it is when people do not communicate their concerns, their faith, their hopes with others?

Our country is divided todays in ways I have never previously seen in my lifetime. People hold deeply divided ideas about what is right and wrong, about how we should live, about what it means to be a citizen of this nation. A big part of this is disagreement about who God is, and what that means in our lives. But, part of that division is that people are simply unwilling to talk with others who have different opinions. We are often willing to talk ABOUT others, but not willing to have a discussion and talk WITH them. You see, communicating is first of all . . . listening.

The Biblical writer, James, inspired by the Lord, wrote these words. “My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” (James 1:19) In conversation with another, how often are we “quick to LISTEN?” For example, a few months ago I read a report on the internet about a situation in our local schools. It turns out that the report did include some facts, but the conclusions were extremely slanted. I was concerned, as a Christian, by what I read and discussed it with some people who knew the situation. By listening to the whole story I came away with a totally different perspective. But, perhaps you were also taught as I was, that “a half a truth is really a lie.”

In many pastoral classes on counseling I was taught about ‘active listening.’ That means paying attention when another speaks, and repeating back their message before speaking ourselves. Perhaps such communicating honors what God meant when He led James to write about being “quick to listen.”

Unfortunately, when people refuse to listen, they often do what James warned against; they are quick to become angry, and share that anger in their speech. Angry words lead to angry actions. Usually an act of violence is first preceded by harsh words. That is why another directive from God tells us that we should be “speaking the truth in love.” (Ephesians 4:15)

I could write a book on what God says in Scripture about healthy communication. Jesus teaches that the one to whom we should ultimately listen is God Himself. When communicating truths of God’s kingdom in parables, Jesus often repeated the phrase, "He who has ears to hear, let him hear." (Mark 4:9, Luke 8:8, Luke 14:35) Are we listening to God? By the way, Jesus Himself is “The Word of God,” (John 1:1-14) our Lord’s greatest message!

If people in our country communicated in healthy ways, “being quick to listen”, and “speaking the truth in love,” there would still be areas of disagreement, but I am convinced that there would be somewhat less division. But, before we can speak truth, we need to hear the truth, by listening to our Lord.

Are you listening first of all to God? Do you listen to others, even those with whom you may have differences? When you speak, are you speaking the truth in love? Our world and your life will be a better place if we listen well and communicate the true love of God’s love. God’s truth, by the way, is Jesus.