Community within the Church

Ten years ago, our church began to formalize and promote the idea of “community groups” within our church. These were small groups of people committed to gathering on a regular basis for the purpose of sharing a meal at the dinner table, enjoying like-minded fellowship, pursuing godward conversations, discussing scripture and recent sermons we heard in church, spending time in group prayer, and being there for each other.

The seed of excitement sprouted quickly within me, and my husband was on board when I asked him about starting a couples community group. We signed up, reviewed the information about how to get a group started, and discussed what kind of a group we hoped to put together. Since we were heading into the “empty nest” years, we thought it would be good to invite people in a similar stage of life, who also had at least one public school employee and/or fisherman in the family so that our schedules would hopefully jive well. We invited one couple who had been our friends for many years to be our ‘side-kick’ leaders. We then asked three other couples who all said “yes” to joining the group. In 2016 we added another couple, bringing our number up to twelve committed members.

Twice a month since 2012 we have gathered in one of our homes, sat down to a delicious meal that we’ve all had a hand in preparing, shared about what’s happening in our lives, told stories, asked each other questions, listened, and laughed until we were ready to move into the living room to begin our time of discussion (whether it’s the Bible passage or book we are studying together as a church, or another book we are working through together for the purpose of growth and discussion). Group prayer always followed our discussion time. When done with the structured part of the evening, we ate dessert, visited a bit more, and eventually headed home.

Sometimes we gather around one of our fire pits for our time together. During 2020 we did Zoom meetings to stay connected and to check in on one another until we could gather safely outside. In 2021 we began to meet in-person again. We had missed being together!

An array of life circumstances and challenges have washed across our group in a decade, and as each experience has touched us (some threatening to knock us over) we have grown closer through opening up to one another about those experiences. We have been able to share our hearts, our concerns, our questions, and our challenges, and have encouraged and upheld one another in prayer. We have wrestled with scripture together and grown from each other’s knowledge and ideas. It has been so beneficial to process sermons together and to deepen our understanding by grappling with teaching we have heard from the same pulpit on the same day.

We have celebrated the marriages of our children, welcomed each other’s grandchildren, grieved the loss of loved ones, been concerned and in prayer for one another over health issues faced, walked through the process of retirement one by one, shared the challenges of how to enter into the lives of aging parents, helped one another move to new homes, made meals together for Faith Recovery Fellowship, fed one another on numerous occasions, celebrated 10 Christmases together, and basically became family. We have lived out Galatians 6:2 “Bear one another’s burdens and therefore fulfill the law of Christ.”

I know we are only one of over 40 Community Groups in our church. It’s a thriving, organized phenomenon. I hear that other churches do similar groups as well. We have found it vital to one’s spiritual growth to find a trusted group of other believers to invest in and to be shaped by. I love the verse from Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” This verse is addressing friendship and accountability. The Biblical principal here is that God expects us to live and serve in a community of other believers. Hebrews 10:25 says “Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another – and all the more as you see the Day approaching”.

As a community group, we are currently reading and discussing the book “Side by Side: Walking with Others in Wisdom and Love”. This book explores the idea that we ALL need help, AND we are ALL equipped to be helpers in some capacity. Jesus presented us with the concept that “weakness” is the new strength. When we are ‘weak’ (in touch with our need), He is strong. We need help for our souls, and other committed believers can offer strength through encouragement and wisdom. They can help us refocus on our faith in Christ and remind us of who we are as a child of God and what we have in Him. In truly trusted relationships we can also point out each other’s blind spots and help each other to move into repentance and deeper relationship with God.

Is it always easy to reserve two evenings a month to meet? No. Issues arise and life gets busy, sometimes making it difficult to keep our commitment. Do we need any other friends and family? Yes. It does not exclude others in any way. Do we still need to be part of the larger church body? Absolutely! A small group does not replace the larger gathering of believers, but rather enhances and builds on that experience.

Having our hearts knit together over time in a community group has been a life-source I didn’t realize I had been missing. Starting in the early years, as we committed to sharing more of ourselves and praying together, we grew into a tight family of faith that loves one another well. I hope you have that too, but if not, I share our experience to say that it is possible, and it is worth pursuing.

Kim Ford is a resident of Wasilla.