“It is poison, it is murder.” One mother is using grief to send a message about fentanyl

In a quaint home in Palmer, Julie Bouchard simply beams when she talks about her son, Taegge Lee.

“He’s artistic, poetic, so creative,” she says wistfully as she shows off a piece he did that hangs on her wall.

The piece is simple in its artistry, yet there is much that might be interpreted in it.

“I see a face in there,” she points out.

Mothers often see what others don’t, and that’s what Bouchard is working toward, people seeing that her son was more than his overdose.

Taegge died from a fentanyl overdose in July, 2021.

Described as vibrant, with a personal style that was uniquely his, outwardly his mother says there were no signs to indicate he was suffering from substance use disorder.

“He wasn’t out stealing or doing something like we expect to see,” Bouchard says. “He had a good job and a cabin. He didn’t fit what we think users look like.”

Taegge’s cousin, Michelle Lee, agrees, saying in a Facebook conversation, “We miss Taegge so much. I had no idea that he was having substance abuse issues...it is hard to tell what is just teenage and young adult angst and what is depression or addiction. He was such a sweet and creative person.”

Bouchard knew her son had his struggles but she was shocked when he admitted to using heroin.

“He didn’t want me to worry, that he felt in control,” she said.

As Bouchard talks about her son, she displays another piece of art he created that has been crafted into a bookmark with a quote from poet and writer, Edgar Allen Poe. It reads: “There is no beauty without some strangeness.” There is a self-portrait the Taegge did that she framed and would love to one day have his artwork published somehow. Surrounding herself with his art and mementos keeps her son’s memory alive.

In her grief, Bouchard has found a passion-to end the stigma attached to substance abuse, and she hopes that out of her grief, someone can be saved.

Ending the negative perception of people with substance abuse is not easy, and it’s one that James Savage, Director of Director of Operations-Day One at True North Recovery, Inc., is working to end as well.

“The reality is that addicts steal your cars, addicts rob your houses, addicts steal the exhaust off your cars. But at the core you are talking about a person. You are talking about a person that’s sick, not talking about somebody that’s bad,” said Savage. “The reality is that unwell people do unwell things, whether it’s theft, crime, but more importantly, it’s the harm they are causing to themselves and their family.”

Bouchard takes comfort in knowing that her son likely passed in his sleep, but is shocked at the amount of fentanyl that was in her son’s system, about four times the lethal dose.

“With over 100,000 people dying from fentanyl, it’s not an overdose, it’s poisoning. It’s a murder. Because most of these people don’t know they’re taking fentanyl. They’re not always consciously aware of what they’re taking. I don’t believe my son knew what he was taking, and it was deadly. That’s another stigma we’ve got to break. It’s a poisoning.”

She also has a dire warning for parents.

“Just because your kid isn’t using illegal drugs doesn’t mean they can’t pick up a pill somewhere. It (fentanyl) is readily available on social media. They have menus on snapchat, and kids can use emoji’s, knowing what they mean, and bypass anything getting flagged. It’s so easy that you can have someone in your driveway in five minutes delivering it. And it’s not just because your kid is an addict. It could be for menstrual pain or a tooth ache,” Bouchard said.

Bouchard has been actively meeting with local politicians and state representatives and working with other parents who’ve lost their children to substance abuse disorder to spread the message about Taegge, and about fentanyl. Her son’s photo was featured in the current issue of “People” Magazine which did a feature on the fentanyl overdose deaths. “The more we can get together and put the story out there, the more we can try to make a difference so our kids don’t die in vain.”

Taegge’s cousin Michelle has also taken action, setting up a memorial scholarship in Taegge’s name.

“We come from a rich aviation family. His dad has been a pilot in Alaska for 45 years. My father (Taegge’s uncle, David) has been an Alaska pilot for that long as well. The scholarship, Taegge Lee Memorial Aviation Scholarship, will be awarded to a junior or senior in high school, from Talkeetna, to fully fund their private pilot license.” Alaska Floats and Skis @ AK8 is responsible for the scholarship.

“The hope is that we keep on Taegge’s memory in the most positive way possible and help young people to find their passion and have the opportunity to explore it,” said Lee. “The only thing that gives me a smidgen of peace is that maybe his death isn’t somebody else’s heartache. Losing a child is the most devastating thing a parent could ever go through.”

For more information about and to register for treatment, call (907) 313-1333, or visit tnrak.org. For more urgent and immediate help available 24 hours a day, call the crisis line at (907) 982-HOPE.

Contact Mat-Su Valley Frontiersman reporter Katie Stavick at katie.stavick@frontiersman.com