J's World

Sports Editor

Opening Day a national holiday?

Opening day. It is an American holiday rivaling Arbor Day, Sweetheart's Day and even Groundhog Day. It often marks the true start of spring and most importantly, it marks the beginning of baseball season.

The Major League Baseball season seems to last an eternity some years, especially when your team has a pitching staff best known for allowing tape-measure home runs. Sometimes by the time July rolls around, there is a better chance of ABC televising a decent sitcom rather than your team making the playoffs.

Especially if you are a Phillies fan.

Me, I am a Cubs fan -- a lifelong fan. As far back as I can remember, I can recall watching Harry Caray swilling countless Budweisers as the Cubbies would routinely blow four-run leads in the ninth. You may be surprised to hear, but the ol' Cubs have struggled for the past 80 or so years.

Anyhow, despite the fact they have brought me to tears on multiple occasions, I have always been a loyal Cubs fan. That is what made this opening day so important.

The Cubs won! Holy Cow!

Yes, you read it right. No need to adjust your glasses. You do not have cataracts. The Cubs won! They are not only above .500, but undefeated.

Again, Holy Cow! Harry Caray must be doing the jig up in the big ballpark in the sky. But wait, before you get too excited and start shedding those tears of joy, I must tell you that there is a sad part to this story.

I missed it. I missed the game.

Instead of watching the Cubs wallop the hated Mets 15-2, I was at the Frontiersman finishing last Tuesday's sports section. If that doesn't show dedication, nothing does! Just between you and me, that even may warrant a raise.

While the Cubs were televised on ESPN, I was busy at work. Though I was hard at work, as I always am, part of me wondered just how the Cubs were doing. I could have checked the score on the computer, but I resisted temptation. I would never use the Internet for personal use at work. Shame on those who were checking the baseball scores (Casey Ressler).

After the pages were done, ahead of deadline I will add, the staff retired downstairs for the staff meeting. Knowing that the meetings can last longer than a Phillies win streak, I knew there was a possibility that I would not make it home in time to sing along with "Take Me Out to The Ballgame" at the seventh-inning stretch.

Once I got the four Diet Pepsis I need to make it through the average staff meeting, I figured out there is a television in the meeting room. Once I figured this out I did a cartwheel across the room, to the television. This led to two very bad things. First I think I pulled a muscle doing the cartwheel, second there was no cable.

At this point I tried to beg and barter with my editor Frank Ameduri for one or more of the following: Cable in the newsroom so we can watch the Cubs, opening day off and a bag of ice for my pulled muscle. It may not be the smartest thing I have ever done, but I even tried to bribe my boss. I offered Frank half of Casey Ressler's salary and all of the food William Woody gets from his bagel mistress. Apparently $3 and a bag of blueberry bagels were not enough.

I did not even get the bag of ice.

At that point I was desperate to watch the Cubs, and I feared that I might have a torn muscle. I nearly threatened to strike, but failed to go through with my threats due to a fear of being easily replaced.

The meeting ended up taking nearly three days, so I missed not only the Cubs game, but even the highlights on SportsCenter.

I also now have a noticeable limp from the cartwheel injury.

I believe that Opening Day should be declared a national holiday. The only people who should be required to work on Opening Day are those directly related to baseball -- the players, liquor store attendants and pizza delivery drivers.

This would not only give the nation something to rally around, but it also just might prevent personal injury.

Jeremiah Bartz (sports@frontiersman.com) is the Frontiersman sports editor. A half-century of losing hasn't taught him to give up on the Cubbies.