Learn to accept what we cannot change

To the editor:

For most of my adult life I sought to understand the questions of where did we come from and why are we here? Finally, in my late 70s, I have answers that satisfy me personally.

I’d like to share my answers, but other people need to find their own. Fortunately, most of us are content with the way things are, because we can live in relative peace and pursue our own best interest. But more importantly, by living an ordinary human life, the complacent majority of mankind maintains our cultural stability, which insures the survival of our species. Cultural stability also allows mankind to slowly adopt scientific innovations, as well as new social and mental concepts into our everyday way of life.

Cultural changes originate at a local level of society, and sometimes the changes require many generations to become fully accepted. Small communities maintain the cultural institutions that offer employment, education, health care, law enforcement, etc. to the local population. Participation in the community enables people to experience the finer things of life; however, human culture is not perfect, but new ideas are constantly adopted that improve the standard of living for the majority, as well as for many disadvantaged minorities in most modern societies.

Throughout man’s history, gender discrimination has been the rule, and even though there were some practical reasons for much of it in the past, we are finally beginning to appreciate the true value of women. Opposition to the Equal Rights Amendment, as well as outdated religious beliefs, illustrate the reluctance of people to accept cultural change. In addition to cultural changes, it seems our understanding of personal freedom and responsibility toward other people continues to be in need of improvement. Although human beings have enormous potential, we also have a lot to learn.

The vicissitudes of life bring changes that might contradict some religious beliefs and end a sanguine lifestyle, or maybe our pursuit of happiness proves to be fruitless, but regardless of why changes occur, we need to continuously adjust our way of thinking. The ongoing challenge of individual people is to discover and adopt cultural principles that are based on reason.

Even so, there are no guarantees in life. To counter changing circumstances, we can use our common sense to change ourselves — to some extent — which is always difficult, but much easier than trying to change the ways of the world or the mindset of other people. The hard part of human life is learning to accept what we cannot change, because there will always be times when the bitter truth of ancient wisdom will remind us that “when the heart cries for what it has lost, the spirit smiles for what is has gained,” and at some later point, we may come to recognize that “our sincerest laughter, with some pain is fraught.”

Art Carney

Wasilla