Mat-Su: be on the lookout for AWOL canine

Mat-Su Mouth

CODY COME HOME -- A small blue heeler/husky dog went AWOL more than a week ago. No doubt he is out and about, doing wayward doggy things. But his family is worried and Templeton the cat is heartsick.

If you have seen Cody, the renegade doggie, please call 745-0130. The MOUTH understands there is a substantial reward for the return of this well-loved dog.

AWESOME AURORA -- These northern lights have claimed us. This is why we live here.

The blood-red night-time streaks across the sky have inspired. Some claim that the lights reflect God's anger. Some claim that the lights are a gift. Some claim that the red northern lights have been accompanied by blue and white streaks, duplicating an American flag.

Whatever the reason, they're incredible. Don't miss them. Get yourself on the local northern lights hotline -- where watchers initiate a phone tree that alerts others to go outside and look up -- "The Sky Show Is On."

VALLEY QUOTES -- An excavator told the borough's planning commission, "I grew up here but I've never been in front of any board. I gotta tell you -- each and every one of you (commissioners) said the right thing and asked the right questions."

"The letter of the law kills. The spirit of the law gives life." Dick Stoffel, planning commissioner.

"I'm not going to get in the middle of that." assemblyperson Dan Kelly, who sits between assemblywomen Kelly Lankford Ladere and Jody Simpson. Ladere and Simpson were respectfully disagreeing with one another and Kelly was smack-dab in the middle.

"I'd love to snowmachine from the Butte to Upper Susitna . . . legally." assemblyperson Bruce Bush, regarding potential Valleywide snowmachine trails.

"Maybe I spend too much time driving by myself and stewing over these things." assemblyperson Kelly Lankford Ladere.

"Congratulations to Mr. Colver on the birth of your son. But you missed a major opportunity to name your child Talis." assemblyperson Talis Colberg to assemblyperson Jim Colver.

"We should have seen it coming." assemblyperson Bruce Bush regarding the bad traffic and poor road conditions on the Old Glenn Highway.

"The outline of Mr. Colberg's district resembles an elephant." Mayor Tim Anderson.

MAYOR TIM'S PAGE -- Well, Mr. Mayor is speaking out on his own Web Page. Not unlike other leaders' Web sites, this one has some really timely information. The MOUTH is dismayed that there aren't any good jokes, however.

Check it out and talk back to Mayor Tim at: www. themayor.info.

WAY TOO MANY COMPLIMENTS -- The Mat-Su Borough Assembly heard a compendium of compliments at their last meeting. "First rate." "Well done." "Good job." "Excellent compromise." It was an unusually positive night at the old borough but a few of the perennial watchers began to yawn after the 16th accolade.

PLAN AHEAD -- Yesterday was World Town Planning Day. The whole goal of the elusive Nov. 8th holiday is to "celebrate the contributions of community and regional planning to the quality of life of human settlements and their environment."

In our Valley, Talkeetna fifth- and sixth-graders are reviewing a draft transportation improvement project for downtown Talkeetna. Younger students at Trapper Creek Elementary School will be working on art and poetry projects to describe what they like about their community.

WELCOME TO OUR VALLEY WORLD -- Assemblyperson Jim Colver and his wife, Mary Louise, have a new baby. Calum Joseph Cruse Colver was born on Nov. 5. Young Calum debuted after a quick three-hour labor and weighed in at 8.5 pounds.

BRIEFCASE -- It was lonely and suspicious. A briefcase, sitting outside the borough building. Near the parking lot. All by itself. Looking ominous.

Borough aficionados got a bit excited.

Was it filled with poisons or a bomb?

Was it a portable anthrax plant?

Local law enforcement came and investigated. Excellent precautions were taken. The mystery briefcase was carefully opened.

The end of the story is that some unnamed Xerox repairman is perhaps missing his briefcase -- full of a bunch of expensive tools.

FIFTEEN YEARS -- Borough Manager John Duffy celebrates his 15-year longevity with the Matanuska-Susitna Borough. The MOUTH understands that his gray/silver hair is not a result of stress, but a result of genetics.

POSITIVE-LY POTATOES -- Potato patch queen and Valley activist, Betty Vehrs, is pushing caffeine in her morning messages now. She has leased the Four-Corners coffee hut in the middle of the popular potato patch.

The potato-like trailer offers a full selection of designer coffees and teas. Fifty-pound bags of potatoes are for sale. Hot drinks won't be the only fare. There will be daily trivia contests and political wisdom, handed out for free. Patriotic potato propaganda will be prolific. Don't be surprised when you see Mr. and Ms. Potato Head in residence and the baristas wearing potato costumes. "The Potato Says" will be an inspirational motivator to ponder as you have your hot mocha.

Betty is a proud MOUTHKETEER and will give other Mouthketeers a discount -- just for mentioning the Frontiersman's MOUTH column. Remember this when you need a buzz.

THE MOUTH WONDERS:

Is it true that a Christian virus has been afflicting Christian and non-Christian computers alike?

Is it true that the Fred Meyer squash display is on a suicide mission as they leap off the shelves?

Is it true that this is the beginning of the moose fiscal year and the current count of moose fatalities is 20?

Is it true that the alarm system at the borough sounds like a big trash truck in back-up mode?

Barbara Hunt , a local writer and listener, puts words in the MOUTH, which is in its sixth year and is printed twice a month, more or less, depending on the Valley buzz. The MOUTH may be reached at bhunt@alaska.net. MOUTH contributions and submittals may be dropped off, mailed, or faxed to the MOUTH c/o the Frontiersman. Good taste is required and confidentiality assured.