My confessions of a teen insomniac

I am one of those people who just keeps going and going.

I wish I could say I had the life of an Energizer battery, but such is not the case. It seems that from the moment I wake up at 5 a.m. to the moment my head hits the pillow sometime between 9 and 10 p.m. I am running around — singing, studying, feeding my animals, going to youth group, practicing piano and serving as the president of Palmer High School’s FFA (formerly Future Farmers of America) chapter.

I am always tired.

In the morning, my alarm clock rings at 4:45. It is located across the room so I have to drag myself out of bed to hit the snooze and sleep 10 more minutes. When it goes off again at 4:55, I turn it off and turn on the lights. Then, sometimes I’ll walk back over to my bed to lie down for “just a minute.” On those days, I’ll wake up again at 5:45 to my mother’s horrible singing. Not only am I upset I overslept and now have just less than 20 minutes before I have to be out the door, I am revolted my musically astute ears have been assaulted by such an off-key rendition of “Wake Up Your Sleepy Head” so early in the morning.

I stumble through the day in various stages of wakefulness. Of course, if we are reviewing things I already know in class, I’m sure I’ll be wide-awake. In physics, however, where everything is new and nothing makes sense even when you are awake, I will be waging war with my drooping eyelids all period long.

This is not another case of teen-age sleep deprivation. My strict parents still believe 17-year-olds need bedtimes, so I am in bed for seven to eight hours a night. This should give me the recommended amount of sleep.

That is, if I were sleeping.

After such a long and busy day, my body is anxious to get some much-needed rest. My mind, on the other hand, does not seem to have an off button.

It begins to mull over the Spanish vocabulary I haven’t learned quite yet. I start thinking about projectile motion and calculating where the center of mass for my room would be. If that gets old I think about the e-mail I’m going to write to the state FFA advisor when I get the time or a new idea for a newspaper column. My mind is busy thinking while my body is busy not resting.

I have tried all the known remedies for insomnia. I’ve tried counting sheep, but being a farmer who counts sheep all day long, this activity isn’t especially relaxing. I’ve taken a leaf out of Ernie’s book and tried dancing myself to sleep. If you’d like to know how that turned out, go ask my two previous dance instructors.

I’ve spent many hours reading history books, the Bible, the encyclopedia and the dictionary, but have yet to find anything dull enough to lull me gently to sleep.

I’ve tried quietly making elaborate midnight snacks and watching television on mute to avoid waking my stern parents, but nothing seems to help.

Inevitably, I’ll fall asleep about an hour before I need to get up.

And of course, when Mom comes in warbling, I’m fast asleep and late.

Rachel Kenley is a junior at Palmer High School.