No student should have to be afraid

Spectrum, by Sarah Welton

I attended the Bye-Bye Bullies conference in Anchorage, June 20-22, and was impressed with the caliber of speakers and presenters. As a licensed professional counselor who has previously worked in an elementary school, I am familiar with the effects and needs of children being bullied and of the needs of children who bully others. The information on the epidemic of violence and the programs based in research validates my concerns and my practices.

As was mentioned at the conference, our schools must address these issues so that students can study and learn the academic subjects. It is impossible for a child who is anxiety-ridden over taunting or physical attacks to pay attention in school or even attend school.

If a child is not directly taunted or physically harmed, he or she can become fearful and anxious having witnessed these acts. Sometimes, a child may suffer from hearing about incidents. Several young people I have encountered left public school to "home school" or they have dropped out, due to the treatment received at the hands of their peers.

The children who have learned to bully to get their needs met also suffer because socially appropriate relationships are not learned. Children who bully others without appropriate consequences grow up and become adults with few skills or knowledge to address problem solving or ethical conduct, and may not even have a basic understanding of appropriate social interactions.

This is evident in the numbers of people, not just school-age children, who use violence and intimidation to try to get their needs met in our communities, harming others in the process. Experts in the field of emotional intelligence have shown that interpersonal and intrapersonal skills are needed, as much if not more than our academic subjects.

In a crime-prevention class I took at Mat-Su College in 2002, I wrote a brief research paper on school discipline. I found that many schools in our communities were not using discipline programs that were backed by scientific research. Some of the workshop sessions at the conference contained overviews of programs that meet the research-based standards. In the world of No Child Left Behind, it is important that we find the programs that meet these standards for our schools and we should not settle for anything less.

Our systems are flawed when we have "zero tolerance" and do not try to find solutions to problems. Zero tolerance came about in a noble attempt to reduce the possibility of preferential treatment to students due to affluence, achievement, or athletic standing. It also was simple and cost-effective in the short term. What does zero tolerance teach? It does not teach appropriate or logical consequences for the situation. It does not teach problem-solving or alternative solutions. It says that those who mete out the punishment do not have to deal with the problem. It is, pure and simple, a removal of the "problem" for the immediate present time.

We must be careful in our schools and in our communities that the programs we use for discipline do not perpetuate bullying by using intimidation and aggressive tactics to "keep students in line." This modeling of inappropriate behavior does happen in our schools and community. As adults, we may not call it "bullying," but the tactics are the same as in some of our community organizations to a degree that is unhealthy. It is unhealthy in that it models a culture of violence, of put-downs or disrespect for others and creates a fear- based society.

People often think that being aggressive is a positive trait. Aggression refers to acts that violate the rights of others. Appropriate assertiveness respects the rights of all people involved. I ask that people step up to the plate and provide assistance in modeling, teaching, and reinforcing positive relations, showing problem-solving skills, and being appropriately assertive when anyone's rights are being violated. You never know who is watching you and it is known that modeling is a powerful tool in learning!

The public schools must try to teach all students. No student should be afraid to go to school for fear of intimidation or violence. Lunchrooms, restrooms, hallways, school buses, and walking to and from school should not be places to be feared by anyone in our community.

Sarah Welton is a Wasilla resident and member of the Mat-Su Borough School Board.