Senior student encourages cultural exchange

Editor’s note: For three weeks, the Mat-Su Valley Frontiersman will share student perspectives on cultural exchange in Japan through the Palmer-Saroma Sister City Program, in honor of the 35-year relationship. Look for additional coverage on the Saroma delegates’ stay in the Valley July 10-17.

SAROMA, JAPAN — Through foreign exchange, your perspective of the world changes — you have thrown yourself headfirst into the unfamiliar.

To succeed with foreign exchange, you find new definitions of happiness. Happiness is not the same as it is back home — it is intangible. It is the feeling you get eating melon ice cream from a street vendor, walking to the park on a sunny day, or successfully using your chopsticks to eat rice and managing to get more than two or three grains at a time. During the past few weeks, these have been the moments I have tucked away into my heart for safekeeping.

This exchange has truly been the best experience of my life. I have been blessed with the most amazing hosts, whom I love dearly, the Kaibe (KAI-bay) family. They have made the transition from the American lifestyle to the Japanese much easier.

The city of Saroma welcomed me with open arms. Everybody I’ve met has been so kind, inviting and friendly.

Many of the school kids I have interacted with are very shy, but still will smile and wave. The youngest children look at you with wide eyes and mouths agape, marveling at this new and strange person.

One little girl in first grade, through the help of a translator, asked, “Why are the American girls’ noses so big?”

They are all so in awe of how different we look and speak. I have attended classes at Saroma High School, visited club activities at the junior high, and played games at the elementary schools, all of which were wonderful experiences. I most enjoyed attending P.E. class at the high school, where we played softball. Despite the language barriers, sports are basically the same in Saroma as in Palmer.

What has surprised me the most about this exchange is how much I miss the English language. More specifically, I miss my understanding of what was being said around me.

It is so hard for me, a very curious person, to accept the fact that I will be in the dark about many things. All the signs, all the voices — I understand next to nothing.

That gives me all the more reason to be thankful for Nanami, my amazing, wonderful and strong-in-English host sister. She acted as a shoulder to lean on and helped guide me through Japan (literally and figuratively). I have formed a lasting friendship with her that I am sure will continue long after I return to Alaska.

In Nanami’s own words, “Before Peyton came, I was nervous. But she is now a good friend of mine.”

My experiences in Japan have really proven the point, “home is where the heart is.” I have left little pieces of my heart in every place I have been. A part of me will forever reside in this small town in northern Japan with the Kaibes.

My family is not just my biological family and closest friends in Alaska anymore, but my Japanese family as well. It is so very hard to even think about leaving, as it feels like a punch in the stomach, a reality I do not want to accept.

I am completely in love with this country, this town and this lifestyle. I have learned more about myself then I ever thought possible. I realize things about the way I speak, my body language and my little habits I never would have given a second thought to at home.

The idea of travel, in my opinion, is not to return home to continue living the same way, but to let the new environment shape you, and the way you live your life. I know now that I will not be the same person when I return, and I accept that.

In the scope of life, it’s the places you’ve gone, experiences you’ve had and the people you’ve met that matter the most. I have loved every second I have spent in Japan, from being bombarded with questions in fast-paced Japanese, to little victories of words and fragments I can understand; from riding the crowded subway in Sapporo, to walking to school through little Saroma. It has been unforgettable.

There is a certain element of peace being in such a foreign place. I found peace in moments where the world around me was busy and bustling, but I was still and quiet.

In the words of my father, I simply “absorbed” all that was around me. That is really the point of foreign exchange, especially one as short as the one provided by the Palmer-Saroma Sister City program: absorb all you can, experience everything possible and at times, just be.

Say yes to karaoke, eat the sea urchin, octopus or sheep, stay up late watching Harry Potter or Back to the Future in Japanese. Do all these things because they are the memories you will retain — they are the experiences you will reflect on with fondness and nostalgia. But most of all, they are the moments you connect with people.

The Japanese have a wonderful word that does not accurately translate into English. “Kizuna” is loosely translated as “a bond between people at the heart level.” Kizuna is a wonderful thing, but it makes it that much harder to leave.

As I prepare to return to Alaska, my heart aches and I reflect on all I have done here on Hokkaido. I wouldn’t change a thing.

To the Kaibes and the wonderful community of Saroma, thank you for your hospitality, grand gestures and kindness. I am eternally grateful and have so much love for you.

A big thank you also to the city of Palmer for making this trip possible. I learned more through this exchange then I ever thought possible — about myself, my culture and the Japanese lifestyle. I know in my heart I will be back someday, but until then, to my family and new friends, mata ne — see you later.

Peyton Murphy is an incoming senior at Palmer High School.