Take expressway to a Happy Valentine’s Day

I love Valentine’s Day.

It has been one of my favorite holidays since my childhood. On several occasions my sister and I were surprised by our parents with gifts left at the school office or on the kitchen counter when we woke up. I even loved the excitement of passing out valentines to my classmates and receiving theirs in return. I remember feeling so loved by those acts of kindness, no matter how small. Love is worth celebrating. Regretfully, the heart of Valentine’s Day has been lost by the change from the simple to the extravagant tradition of gift giving.

Prior to the worldwide commercialization of Feb. 14, the day was celebrated simply by the exchanging of small gifts, cards and letters among friends and lovers. Over the years, it seems, we’ve trained ourselves to be dissatisfied with anything less than a diamond pendant and flowers from the one we love. Americans spending billions upon billions of dollars each year in the name of Valentine’s Day is astounding. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not anti-Cupid. But I believe our money could be put to better use by putting a little creative thought to work. I would imagine that if we took a nationwide poll at this moment, a vast majority, excluding retailers, would be more than happy to trade the tradition of giving expensive gifts in exchange for an affectionate card or letter and a small token of some sort.

As boxes of chocolates, cutesy balloons, and a dozen red roses seek to lure you in this Valentine’s Day, go ahead and think outside the heart-shaped box and head straight for the card aisle. Nothing quite matches a handwritten note from the one you love. As economical woes hit home this year, give a beautifully old-fashioned (and inexpensive) form of communicating some wings.

It seems that writing your affections down on paper is a lost art that deserves a second chance. When I think of love letters, I think of Jane Austen novels, period films and calligraphy. But it doesn’t have to be that complex. My husband has written me several love letters in our relationship, starting out in our dating years and continuing to this day. Some of them end up on my pillow on a sticky note, others on the kitchen counter scribbled on the to-do list, one tucked in a book, and the most memorable was written on a cup from a coffee stand filled with my favorite drink. Each are appreciated and treasured to this day. We have a small trunk full of mushy cards and letters, movie stubs and concert tickets that we occasionally rifle through for good laughs and even greater memories. The 13-year-old coffee cup even made the cut. A love letter doesn’t have to involve much or even be any certain length; you just need a pen, some paper or a card, and a quiet place to reflect.

Elizabeth Barrett Browning wrote in her famous sonnet, “How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.” I’ve always thought that was such a beautiful line of poetry. Yet sadly, that was the only line I had ever read. Browning doesn’t stop at counting the ways, she goes on to tell the recipient, “I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can reach. …” To tell him/her how you feel, you don’t need a sonnet. Though it couldn’t hurt. The key is to explain your love by telling him/her why you find them irresistible and irreplaceable.

When writing an old-fashioned love letter, (no texting or emailing allowed) start with one of these ideas to get your creativity flowing:

• Recall your feelings when you first met.

• Discuss what initially drew you to him/her.

• Tell how wonderful he/she makes you feel.

• Explain when you knew you were in love.

• Revisit why you decided to pursue a relationship.

• List character traits you admire.

• Mention things you are thankful for in him/her.

• Describe your excitement about your future together.

So now that you’ve got the love letter down pat, what about that smallish token of your love?

First and foremost, avoid waiting until after work on Valentine’s Day to frantically run into the grocery store to grab a pink teddy bear and a single rose. A couple days before the big day, take some time to think about what your sweetie would really appreciate along with your card or letter as a gift. Does she have a favorite book series? Would he most appreciate a date night out to see the newest action movie? Would she like a gift card to a favorite shop? What does he collect? Does she adore a certain flower? Is he eyeing a certain gadget? Valentine’s Day does not have to be an expensive day full of expectations. Let it be a heartfelt chance for you to build your spouse or significant other up with your words and your thoughtfulness. I think your valentine will thank you.

Amanda Bacon can be reached at lovethosebaconbits@yahoo.com.