Tent-dwellers are victims of construction season

Mat-Su Mouth

SPIT ANYWHERE -- The MOUTH has learned that there are more than a few displaced persons residing in tents. This is not a result of a camping fetish. This refugee status is the result of an oh-so-short construction season. Seems Valley residents are doing the tent thing in great number. MOUTH advice suggests that until those homes are built, go ahead and enjoy all that fresh air. Wear a headlamp and spit that toothpaste anywhere.

LAZY DUCK POPULATION INCREASE -- A new pond was built on Lazy Mountain. It's attractive and welcoming. The talented builders placed two duck decoys in the pond. Before long, eight real live mallards moved in. Duck population density peaked.

8 A.M. LINEUP IN PALMER -- What was the lineup of people, so early on a Saturday morning? At the Mat-Su Borough gym?

Even a few loyal place holders had sleeping bags reserving their front place in line.

Grateful Dead tickets? A seat on the space shuttle? Caribou permits? Free food?

Nope. It was the loyal and the faithful queued up and ready to attend the NOLS (National Outdoor Leadership School) end of season used equipment sale.

JUST A NAME CHANGE -- The Valley Women's Resource Center is now the Alaska Family Resource Center. It is still one of the most helpful organizations in the Valley but it now stands ready to assist the entire family.

DOCK DITTY -- Port Mac is in the news again with yet another proposed potential wood-chipping facility.

Thus the repeat of a favorite Valley riddle:

How much chips could a Port Mac chip?

If a Port Mac could ship chips?

TRAFFIC CALMING -- Apparently Valley road rage isn't bad enough. The DOTPF (Department of Transportation) has decided that the Valley's traffic calming needs don't score high enough to receive funding.

RECLAIMING THE SIDEWALKS OF PALMER -- You will see a bit more of the Palmer sidewalks. Jim Cooper and his campaign crew of volunteers went out and cleared the sidewalks last weekend.

They cut sod, tree limbs, weeds and created sidewalks where none existed before.

GRAVEDIGGING WEATHER -- This is a sensitive subject. But, if you have an elderly dog or an older cat, this discussion is worth considering.

Pretty soon the ground will freeze. Solid. Hard as a rock. And it will remain that way until April mush starts flowing.

In the interim, there are those dearly loved animals that may not see springtime.

If you're facing this situation, the MOUTH gently advises that this is the time to dig an anticipatory grave.

Better to have "Millicent the cat" buried respectfully by the flowering Mayday tree than to take her to the landfill in a garbage bag.

PIECES OF CHEESE IN YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD -- The Valley school buses are back, traveling nearly every single road in Mat-Su. A French foreign exchange student likened the buses' identifiable color to that of a piece of cheese.

The new school bus barn on the PW is a central location. But its busyness could cause a nine-minute delay -- according to a limited traffic impact analysis.

THE MOUTH WONDERS:

Is it true that a "wind ordinance" would prevent flying outhouses?

Is it true that Assemblyman Kelly has dispensed with his beard, and thus with the "Don Young for Congress" look?

Infamous borough scribe Barbara Hunt puts words into the Mouth every month. Anyone who has questions, tips or suggestions for the Mouth may fax them to her at 376-8059 or to her attention at the Frontiersman at 352-2276.

People may also mail their tips or suggestions, or drop them off at 5751 E. Mayflower Ct., Wasilla AK 99654. The Mouth is also accessible on the Internet at bhunt@alaska.net.

Confidentiality will be respected. Accuracy is required and good taste requested.