The thing about lying

Perhaps no one in the history of lying has ever made less trouble for him or herself by lying.

Whether you’re nearly 3 and trying to convince your dad it was your sister — not you — who took all the candy from the Dec. 23 date on the advent calendar or Alaska State Troopers caught you driving drunk, lying about it doesn’t make things better.

It’s not easy to be accountable for one’s actions, just ask Jack A. Collins, 21, and Tyler A. Doyle, 23. The two were stopped Saturday morning for speeding, but had rung up a bunch more charges before the AST traffic stop was complete.

When Collins stopped the car, he hopped out and took off on foot. If speeding was bad decision No. 1, running from troopers was bad decision No. 2.

While Collins was hoofing it in the neighborhood of Bogard Road near McKinley Drive, his passenger, Doyle, was making trouble for himself by lying to troopers about the driver’s identity.

He said it was Daniel Walsh driving, not Collins. That would be bad decision No. 3.

Trooper Dan Sadloske made the stop and called in AST police dog Roelle, who tracked Collins down a short distance away.

Even after Collins was standing in front of him after being captured, still Doyle lied. He told troopers he didn’t know the man and that the man they’d captured was not the driver. Bad decision No. 4.

It wasn’t until troopers searched the vehicle and found court paperwork listing him as third-party custodian for Collins that Doyle came clean. Good decision No. 1.

To truly appreciate the bad decision-making here, we need to back up a bit to the prequel and tell you why Collins needed a third-party custodian anyway. That bit of bad decision-making started in February when Collins was charged with habitual minor in possession, drunken driving and being a minor who was driving after drinking. He pleaded guilty to the drunken driving charge in exchange for the other two being dropped. Prequel bad decisions Nos. 1, 2 and 3.

Then in November, when Collins was 20, he racked up another DUI and another minor habitually in possession of alcohol. Prequel bad decisions No. 2 and 4.

It was this November incident that led to Collins’ need of Doyle as a third-party custodian.

Saturday, both men left the traffic stop in the back of a trooper patrol vehicle. Doyle chose poorly when he let Collins drink and he let him get behind the wheel of a car and again when he got in that vehicle as a passenger. Prequel bad decisions Nos. 5, 6 and 7.

Collins, who just turned 21, was hit with felony DUI charges because this is his third drunken driving offense.

And Doyle was charged with making a false report, hindering prosecution and violating his custodial duties. His bail was set at $1,000.

Whether you are 3, 33 or 83 — tell the truth, especially to law enforcement — it can save you a lot of trouble, jail time, fines and a criminal record.