There are no snakes in Alaska, but watch where you step!

Kristen Seine /For the Frontiersman

What do you do when your peacock gets away from you, climbs a neighbor's tree, falls down, and knocks itself out?

That's not an issue most Alaskans have ever had to contend with. Nor have most folks in the 49th state ever wondered where in the world their beefalo has gotten off to. And it's safe to say that most Alaskans have never walked into their bathroom and found a scorpion sitting on their toilet seat. But one Mat-Su resident did.

What do you do? You call animal control.

"We see just about everything in here," said Dave Allison, chief of Animal Care and Regulation for the Mat-Su Borough. "Believe me, it's not just dogs and cats."

People bring some rather interesting animals in to the borough's animal shelter, Allison said. As was the case with Monty, the 10-foot python snake whose owner could no longer handle him. Literally. "It took two people to handle Monty," Allison said. Because if Monty got the upper hand, he could coil his giant body around you and squeeze in typical python fashion. "He could definitely put the hurt on you."

Allison said at any given time the shelter houses - alongside a variety of dogs and cats - "horses, goats, pigs, rabbits, ferrets, hamsters," and even fish. "People have brought in their goldfish," he said. "And then there's a whole variety of birds."

Like peacocks, believe it or not. "He really did conk himself out," Allison said. "Eventually, the owner came and retrieved him."

Things can be just a bit noisy at times, he said. "We had a goose brought in last week. So the dogs are barking, the cats meowing, and the goose honking."

Allison's job is not a boring one. Occasionally, though, he goes out on calls that are more memorable than others. Like the scorpion.

"It was a stray," he said. "Apparently, a previous tenant had lost it and it had ended up somewhere in the building. Until it ended up on that lady's toilet seat, that is.

"She was rather excited," he said with a chuckle. Animal control officers "rescued" the scorpion, but unfortunately, it died at the shelter. "But only because the lady had sprayed it with hairspray."

And there has been more than one snake, too, he said. "There was an albino python that got loose and ended up in someone's yard. And several months ago, there was another snake that got loose and ended up in someone's bathroom. It was coiled around the toilet." And there was the "beefalo" that got lost recently. "It's a cross between a cow and a buffalo," Allison said. "There's a resident out here that raises them."

To date, there have been no loose jackalopes in the area, however.

But animal control has received calls on wolf hybrids, donkeys, horses and cows. And a stray turtle roaming the area. "And then there are the drug houses," Allison said. "We'll get a call from a utility worker who's gone to read a meter, and the reading is sky high. And there's a bunch of dogs attacking the utility worker. They've been trained to guard someone's marijuana operation."

Many of the animal rescue calls officers go out on are anything but dull. Last spring, a dog became trapped under a 40-foot container, Allison said. "The dog had made a habit of going under there, apparently," he said, and one day got trapped underneath. "The fire department came out to help lift the container, and we got the dog out."

Officers have gone on rescues where "dogs have fallen off ravines and we've gone down and retrieved them," and dogs and other animals have become struck on islands. In one instance, a dog was stranded on an island on the Matanuska River, he said. A volunteer brought his airboat and they took the dog to shore. Mat-Su animal-control officers often find themselves having to use their ingenuity. Unlike some of their big-city counterparts, they don't carry equipment for some of the more exotic animals they encounter. So they wing it.

"I try to hire people who can think creatively," Allison said. "With the scorpion, we found a jar and scooped him right up," he said with a laugh. "With the snake, we used a set of cat tongs and a pillowcase. When we had a dog that fell through the ice recently, we dropped a tree and used it for a snare pole."

On a more serious note, not all animal calls have happy outcomes. On Thursday, Allison and his officers were called out for four loose horses on the Palmer-Wasilla Highway. "Unfortunately, one of the four was hit by a car - a mare, a beautiful brown-quarter horse mix. The mare was killed, and it put one gentleman in the hospital."

Officers had been simultaneously called for four other loose horses near Butte. Uncontained livestock are a common call, especially in winter.

"It's a shame, especially when the outcome is a sad one like the mare," Allison said. "But also, people make significant monetary investments in most of these animals. They need to make sure their containment is sufficient."

He said it's important to check fences, especially after a heavy snow. "Either moose go through them," he said, "or (the livestock) can break through the electric fence because the snow can cover the ground wire or insulate it.

"I tell people, you check the oil in your car every once in a while, I would hope people would check their fences at least as much, to keep their investments safe."