Thieves cause life-threatening confusion

MAT-SU -- Here's a test -- the next time you're tooling around the Valley, count how many street signs are missing from their posts.

Chances are drivers will see more signs missing on their way to the grocery store than they've got fingers. Now think about what would happen if emergency responders were on their way to a home down any one of those streets, but were waylaid because drivers can't find the right road.

It happens all the time, said Mel Vostry, Mat-Su Borough Emergency Services coordinator. And it really gets under his skin.

"My adrenaline level goes up, my frustration level goes up and then my blood pressure goes up," Vostry said. "I really get angry when you have to guess at what street you're on."

It's not just Vostry's health missing street signs affects. It's the health and safety of people awaiting an ambulance or other emergency response.

"It's bad enough when there's somebody in pain and anxious and scared, that we can't find them in a timely manner," Vostry said. "It's downright criminal when somebody's dying and we can't find them because of a missing street sign."

Chuck Braun, at the Mat-Su Borough's maintenance and operations shop, said his staff try to replace missing street signs as soon as they notice the problem. Part of his and his road supervisors' job, he said, is to look for and report street signs that have gone missing. And they're not the only ones on the lookout -- he gets a lot of calls from the public, reporting missing street signs. With 1,100 borough-owned roads in the Mat-Su and intersections numbering many times more than that, the job is never-ending. But it does seem to go in cycles.

Late summer and early fall, Braun said, is when more signs seem to go missing -- apparently the victims of students cramming in last-minute pranking before the school year. When the school year is back in session, there's typically a decrease in sign theft.

The pranksters aren't after just any street sign, Braun said. Some are sure bets to be stolen.

"Women's names are right at the top of the list," he said. "If it's a lady's name, it seems to go away a lot quicker."

In fact, Braun said, his staff has taken to greasing the poles under some of the signs that are more regularly stolen. But there still isn't a good solution for signs that are routinely used as target practice.

"I don't know what those poor signs did to anybody, but they sure take some abuse," Braun said.

The truth is, although sign theft or destruction may seem like a harmless prank, it is theft -- third-degree theft for a sign with a street name, a class-A misdemeanor punishable by a fine of up to $10,000 and a year in jail. More expensive signs may reach felony status.

It's also a drain on taxpayers' money, Braun said. The money to pay for the signs comes from local road service areas' budgets. The cost of the signs ranges from about $100 for a sign bearing a street name to $2,000 for new federally approved signs put together with special break-away bolts, one of which can cost $25. Some road service areas, Braun said, struggle to come up with the funding to complete necessary maintenance projects in their area each year and lost signs prove to be an added burden. More than that, he said, it's a life-safety issue. Vostry agreed. Last winter, he said, he counted dozens of signs missing in the Wasilla area alone.

"It's dangerous. It's just about as dangerous as stealing a stop sign," Vostry said. "I really have no way of being politically correct about it -- it's dangerous."