Don Sorenson

Well, you can't count forever. Don Sorenson was a husband, a father, a grandpa and a Veteran and he went out with the Northern Lights Friday morning October 11th.

Our dad was probably cooler than your dad, to be honest. And stronger too. There are no dads stronger I already checked. He was a thumb war winner, a bear hug giver. He was so talented that he didn't even need all the good looks, those were just bonus. Even though he doesn't need a smoking hot body he was cremated with his knife in his hand.

I wouldn't say he died peacefully, he was pretty pissed about it, much like everyone else that knew him. A lifelong non-smoker, he got his cancer from Agent Orange. He wasn’t ready to go and its stupid that he had to really, because obviously there’s a cure for cancer under a giant pile of money somewhere. Now here we sit, all broken hearted STILL waiting on VA Benefits that never started.

A dragon story teller and hopeful hobbit hole dweller. He was an artist and he had a flare for writing run on sentences which is clearly genetic. His beard was legendary and his wit unmatched. You could say he drove a water truck but you'd be wrong. He maneuvered a di hydrogen monoxide machine and all other machines like a freaking gazelle, though.

None of you are invited to his service because he doesn't want to "spend one extra penny on this bulls*!t." In lieu of flowers please go vote for Trump, he tried to but his absentee ballot still hasn't shown up and he can't use it posthumously because he doesn't vote Democrat. If you're not going to vote and you still want to send flowers, his favorite flowers were ribeye and New York strip but he likes us to pick them out. He is survived by everyone who is not dead today. This includes his wife of 42 years, Paula. 5 kids: Jenny (and Chris), Ivan, Jackie (and Ben), Isaac, Hank. 6 Grandkids: Izella, Tyler, Winter, Doni, Navy, Beck. His siblings: Sue, Norvel, Joel, Darren. He is preceded in death by his parents: Betty and Whitey and 2 siblings Lori and Bob. He never did confirm which kid was his favorite, but we all saw him wink at Jackie.